That's not cool

I’d like to say it was cool nodding off in a train station bathroom, but it wasn’t. I’d like to say it was cool stealing pills from my grandmother’s medicine cabinet, but it wasn’t. I’d like to say it was cool watching my mother cry when I was arrested for the first time at 17, but it wasn’t. I’d like to say it was cool having my father bail me out time after time, but it wasn’t. I’d like to tell you it was cool taking and selling drugs, but it wasn’t.
Recovery has shown me what actually being cool means. Cool is showing up sober on Mother’s Day. Cool is paying your own bills on time. Cool is sitting at Christmas dinner and buying presents for everyone with your own money. Cool is helping your dad out around the house without wanting anything in return. Cool is showing up when people need you.
This list can continue all day, but the bottom line is, addiction isn’t cool, but recovery is the coolest.

#TheAddictsDiary

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